Whimsical Tidings!

Ahoy there Internet Lubbers!

I can’t believe it’s Thursday! Wait, is it Thursday where you are? Maybe I accidentally jumped into the future. Nonetheless, I wanted to bring you a few newsical notes from the desk of moi. So here I am and here you are and here we go…

  • Last week I stitched up a bra in just under 9 hours. It’s a doozy of a bra and while attending the class I definitely drank the “sew your own bra, love your boobs” kool-aid. I of course, continue to love my boobs, but I am not so sure I want to start sewing bras all the time. You never know what the future may hold! I could grow a third boob and then I would definitely need a specially made bra. At least I have the skills to handle that triboob situation. Soon though, you will see a bra sewing-stravaganza in an issue of Ye Olde Periodical (for which I am gainfully employed) and it will be authored by moi.

    Hooray for fun!

    Hooray for fun!

  • A few weeks ago I made this bad ass card. It’s rather fancy wouldn’t you say? I’ve been thinking of posting a tutorial on how to make it. Might you like to know the secrets of my card making ways?
  • This week I have been obsessing over WhimseyBox! It’s a crafts by mail subscription service. Once per month I will receive a box with a complete craft inside. I will of course immediately plunder the contents, revel in all the glory and love the crap out of my creation. Why? Because if there’s nothing I love more than crafting it’s mystery crafting. Want to join in on the fun? Normally boxes cost $15 per month, but if you click here you can get a box for only $5 (and to be perfectly honest I will get a free box if you sign up, however you qualify for this same offer as soon as you sign up, so if we keep the crafting chain going we’ll all have free crafty boxes and giant crafting parties [wow this is a long parenthetical add on]).
  • Secrets, secrets! I have been working on so many secret projects lately I can’t stand it! I want to show you all of them and reveal my world of craftiness. Alas, of you fine few readers out there these gifts are for 12% of you, so you’ll just have to wait.
  • Do you know of Alie and Georgia? They are super-duperly fantastic gal pals from California! Here are the ways in which they are fantastic:
    Alie and Georgia! (Photo courtesy of Cooking Channel, click this photo to see more Cooking Channel).

    Alie and Georgia! (Photo courtesy of Cooking Channel, click to see more Cooking Channel).

    They invent fancy-ass cocktails for your mouth to love.
    They podcast from a pillow/blanket fort.
    They wear the cutest dresses ever.
    They are friends with fabulous people like Hannah Hart (of My Drunk Kitchen) and Mamrie Hart (of You Deserve a Drink).
    They have a brand new show about traveling, drinking and being BFFs! We should have a viewing party, what do you say? I’ll bring the liquor cabinet, you bring the ice!

So that’s that!

Now you know what’s been rattling around the treasure chest I call a skull. I must leave you for my MLM (Maniacal Ladies in Masks) meeting. Are you a member? I might never know! If you are wink thrice at me then offer me a cup of loathing punch. If it is I behind the mask I will respond by drinking the punch in one gulp and belching the maniacal alphabet.

Toodle Loo Darlings!

XOXO,

Henny Penny

 

 

Listed Sisters

What’s cookin’ chickadees and chickadon’ts?

I’ve been mired in the bog of responsibility lately, however I thought I would pop in to give you a quick update as to the Henny and Mr. McCluckin’ whereabouts. Here’s a list of all the exciting activities we’ve been up to (most of which are true):

1) Redoing my crafty Shangri-La for a fancy magazine spread. I was selected to share my craft room in an upcoming publication. There was a fancy photo shoot and many quotations sprang from my lips. What did this really entail? About 6 hours shopping at Ikea and other curio shoppes for cute and matching organizational tools, a week’s worth of work pulling everything off the shelves and a weekend putting things back on the shelves in a delightful and enticing way. You may recall the look of my craft room from a previous post. Well things had been a-changin’ prior to the shoot and woo-whee did that speed up my time table for projects. There was so much organization, it was like a Martha Stewart wet dream. I would love to show you my new and delightful room, but I am not allowed to scoop the magazine. I promise to show you all the fancy happenings as soon as I am allowed.

2) Training the wee pooches for the next itty bitty Iditarod. It’s not too hard to get them to pull a sled and they are slowly learning what “mush” means. The worst part is getting them to leave their passenger, Madame Tatiana alone. Madame is a teacup pig and just loves riding in the sled. Our theme is “watch this tiny pig fly” I think the judges will love it! Cleo and Rita will be dressed as airplanes.

3) I have taken up the dreaded craft of knitting. After avoiding this for a solid decade, I finally figured it might be worth it to make my own socks. Plus down the road I want to make a sweater dress, so I better get my crap together. I just today borrowed my first needles and have been trying my hand at the pointy stick manipulation. I am not impressed so far.

Oliver3.5) I met this bird Oliver on Sunday.

4) Mr. McCluckin’ was nominated for a Nobel prize! Of course, by Nobel prize I mean U.S. patent and by nominated I mean submitted the necessary paperwork through his work fellows. In 3-6 years we’ll know the outcome. He’s developed a widget that clamps onto the big toe of rabid roosters. This way you always know which roosters are rabid. Granted, the frothing at the mouth and attempting to peck you to death is a sure-fire way to know which rooster is rabid, but that’s neither here no there.

5) I’ve been working on a present that’s a big surprise for someone very fancy. It involves a hoop, a needle and piles of floss. I’m sure you can guess what I’m up to.

How about you? Have you been terribly busy? Can I just say, working full time is for the bees, we birds need a rest! Well, I am about to collapse into a heap of snoring lady parts, so I best be on my way. Please tell all the children in your neighborhood that I intend to steal their candy.

Sincerestly,

Henny Penny